Post by HardRocker on Sept 4, 2010 0:12:29 GMT -5
Hey Y'all, it me HardRocker
It's been quite some time since I've been on here and I want you all to know that I do miss all y'alls. I mostly only get computer time anymore in the wee hours of the night/morning after the kids have all crashed into bed and most of that time has been job searches, etc.
But tonight they went to bed fairly early and I thought I'd share a funny story with you all (since I missed a few of my 'brothers' at the Binghamton meet (2MM, KF, etc-- based on me not reading the calendar right ===doh! sucks !!).
Anyway, here's the story:
Last Sunday afternoon my wife was canning some jams and jellies and wanted the kids out from underfoot in the kitchen. So, the two younger ones went to bed for a nap and the two older ones I took with me to Home Depot for a few things. Now, the closest Home Depot is about 40-45 minutes away and the kids were not real keen on the idea of going, but I knew I could 'sell' them on the idea if I took a Monte Carlo. (The stuff I needed I could not find at the 2 Lowe's stores that are closer and the local HW stores.)
So I get some music for the road loaded up into the 6-disc changer and off we go. We jam out and cruise down the road with 2x65 AC blasting our hair back. We get to the HD and grab our stuff and few other things. I figure on the way home I'd take them by one of the junkyards just so they can see what happens to old, crashed and unwanted cars.
Well, we get out to the parking lot and there is an 85 MCSS a few spaces over with the hood up. There's another guy with a Grand Marquis trying to jump start him. So I watch as we load our stuff into the trunk and the "kid" (20-25 yo) is struggling to get the MC to fire off. So we pull over with the 75 MC to see what's what. Well I see him pouring gas down the 4bbl Edelbrock on a Performer manifold and then he pumps the gas as he tries turning the engine over. He curses and spits and the car and says he had no trouble getting it started to leave the house to come to here. So I tell him he's flooded the carb now and just needs to hold it to floor, maybe let it back fire out of the carb a time or two to burn off the excess gas and he'd be on his way. But he tries turning it over again and pumps the pedal again as he does so.
By now he's just got no juice coming from his battery and the Grand Marquis is taking forever to push across enough current through the cheap jumper cables they had. So I pull up close and we throw another set of cables on and double up. Then I ask him if he'd mind if I took a stab at starting his MC. He said sure and if I get it started I can take it home and he'd take my 75 !! (NOT!) So I jump in, hold the pedal to the floor and give it a crank..... about 5 rotations and the sawed off exhaust pipes roar to life.
So he thanks me as we unhook cables and he's still trying to talk me into swap cars. Then I realize he's got a For Sale sign in the window....$600. Well, I had been scanning the car and the rockers on both sides were rotted away as was parts of the frame over the rear wheels and out under the trunk. The quarters were getting blistered and riddled as well. So I pass.
As I start to pull away, the guy gives me the sign to smoke my tires. Well, my 75 sucks more air in places it shouldn't and spits oil out like an asphalt truck, but I give it a try.... barely a squeal. So I turn the wheel hard and put it into a doughnut... then she starts squealing. Now the tires are warmed up and I brake stand it a time or two as I zip across from the Home Depot parking lot to the Wal-mart parking lot adjacent to it.
When I find a spot in the Wally World parking lot, I put the car up into park and key off the engine. And as it snapped into Park, I hear a clang ring out from the floor board and the sound of little pieces of metal hitting the blacktop. I sink back into my seat with a grimace and a groan.
As I get out of the car I look underneath to verify my suspicions were correct. Needless to say, my kids jump out hootin' and hollerin' like Bo and Luke over our Dukes-like driving. Then my daughter asks me what I'm looking at. I tell her I'm looking at a long walk home. !! LOL. With a puzzled look from son, I tell him to look underneath the car and that those parts he's seeing are pieces of a once whole universal joint that we just ripped in two.
The next comment from him was, "You're not going to call Mom are you?!!" Half crying and half laughing, I'm like Yup buddy, I am. The response I got on the other end of the line was something along the lines of "What the hell do you want me to do about it, you're the mechanic, beside I'm still canning?!?!" LOL!! Yup, about what I expected...
So I look up Auto Part stores near me on my web and GPS enabled phone and find an AutoZone about 4 miles away. I call them up. He has a U-joint in stock but he's closing in 5 minutes. I tell him my situation and that I didn't know how I was going to get there in 5 minutes, even if I called a cab. He thinks for a moment and tells me if I can wait a little bit, he's closing up the store and is heading my direction and will drop the U-joint off to me ! Cool ! Got a deal !!
Now I call back to the house and my brother-in-law answers, who has come to me rescue only a few months ago when I ran the Suburban out of gas ! LOL. So I ask him if Ed's Towing and AAA Roadside Repair service is on standby as I have need for assistance. I give him the list of tools to grab off the workbench and give him my 20. To which that response was something like, "What the F- are you doing all the way out there?! I don't even know which direction you're in or how to get there!" So I relay some directions and he sets sails.
The kids and I push the Monte to the back of the lot and under a pole light and then head inside Wally World. I get some shop towels, hand cleaner, wheel chocks (forgot to tell my rescuer to grab mine from the house), and a couple of hot pizza's from their in-store Subway.
Ed shows up about an hour later. We fire up the propane torch and melt out the plastic retainers and then pop off the internal clips while my 8-year old son is under the car to unbolt the yoke clamps from the differential. We get everything together and bolted up tight in another 20 minutes and have the car back down to the ground. We take care of our garbage, clean up our hands and we are back on the road again with a new universal joint and one heck of a story !! What should have been a 2.5-3.0 hour trip became 6.5 hours as we waited for parts, tools, and then made repairs in the Wally parking lot.
We never did get to go by the junkyard as it was 8:00PM at this point and dark. And now I wish I had gotten the kid's number for the 85 SS. I had a guy call me just a few days later this week asking about doors and a trunk lid for an 86 SS. Word around the hills here is that I'm the Monte guy and can't help find parts. Plus I really could have used that engine from that SS to transplant into the 75 for a while or at least the intake and carb setup !! I could have gotten $600-worth of parts and usage out of that car. Dang my luck !!
Anyway, I apologize for my absence and I hope you all enjoyed that story. Oh, and you know that has to be a real story cause you just can't make schtuff like that up !!
HardRocker
2GMontes@gmail.com
It's been quite some time since I've been on here and I want you all to know that I do miss all y'alls. I mostly only get computer time anymore in the wee hours of the night/morning after the kids have all crashed into bed and most of that time has been job searches, etc.
But tonight they went to bed fairly early and I thought I'd share a funny story with you all (since I missed a few of my 'brothers' at the Binghamton meet (2MM, KF, etc-- based on me not reading the calendar right ===doh! sucks !!).
Anyway, here's the story:
Last Sunday afternoon my wife was canning some jams and jellies and wanted the kids out from underfoot in the kitchen. So, the two younger ones went to bed for a nap and the two older ones I took with me to Home Depot for a few things. Now, the closest Home Depot is about 40-45 minutes away and the kids were not real keen on the idea of going, but I knew I could 'sell' them on the idea if I took a Monte Carlo. (The stuff I needed I could not find at the 2 Lowe's stores that are closer and the local HW stores.)
So I get some music for the road loaded up into the 6-disc changer and off we go. We jam out and cruise down the road with 2x65 AC blasting our hair back. We get to the HD and grab our stuff and few other things. I figure on the way home I'd take them by one of the junkyards just so they can see what happens to old, crashed and unwanted cars.
Well, we get out to the parking lot and there is an 85 MCSS a few spaces over with the hood up. There's another guy with a Grand Marquis trying to jump start him. So I watch as we load our stuff into the trunk and the "kid" (20-25 yo) is struggling to get the MC to fire off. So we pull over with the 75 MC to see what's what. Well I see him pouring gas down the 4bbl Edelbrock on a Performer manifold and then he pumps the gas as he tries turning the engine over. He curses and spits and the car and says he had no trouble getting it started to leave the house to come to here. So I tell him he's flooded the carb now and just needs to hold it to floor, maybe let it back fire out of the carb a time or two to burn off the excess gas and he'd be on his way. But he tries turning it over again and pumps the pedal again as he does so.
By now he's just got no juice coming from his battery and the Grand Marquis is taking forever to push across enough current through the cheap jumper cables they had. So I pull up close and we throw another set of cables on and double up. Then I ask him if he'd mind if I took a stab at starting his MC. He said sure and if I get it started I can take it home and he'd take my 75 !! (NOT!) So I jump in, hold the pedal to the floor and give it a crank..... about 5 rotations and the sawed off exhaust pipes roar to life.
So he thanks me as we unhook cables and he's still trying to talk me into swap cars. Then I realize he's got a For Sale sign in the window....$600. Well, I had been scanning the car and the rockers on both sides were rotted away as was parts of the frame over the rear wheels and out under the trunk. The quarters were getting blistered and riddled as well. So I pass.
As I start to pull away, the guy gives me the sign to smoke my tires. Well, my 75 sucks more air in places it shouldn't and spits oil out like an asphalt truck, but I give it a try.... barely a squeal. So I turn the wheel hard and put it into a doughnut... then she starts squealing. Now the tires are warmed up and I brake stand it a time or two as I zip across from the Home Depot parking lot to the Wal-mart parking lot adjacent to it.
When I find a spot in the Wally World parking lot, I put the car up into park and key off the engine. And as it snapped into Park, I hear a clang ring out from the floor board and the sound of little pieces of metal hitting the blacktop. I sink back into my seat with a grimace and a groan.
As I get out of the car I look underneath to verify my suspicions were correct. Needless to say, my kids jump out hootin' and hollerin' like Bo and Luke over our Dukes-like driving. Then my daughter asks me what I'm looking at. I tell her I'm looking at a long walk home. !! LOL. With a puzzled look from son, I tell him to look underneath the car and that those parts he's seeing are pieces of a once whole universal joint that we just ripped in two.
The next comment from him was, "You're not going to call Mom are you?!!" Half crying and half laughing, I'm like Yup buddy, I am. The response I got on the other end of the line was something along the lines of "What the hell do you want me to do about it, you're the mechanic, beside I'm still canning?!?!" LOL!! Yup, about what I expected...
So I look up Auto Part stores near me on my web and GPS enabled phone and find an AutoZone about 4 miles away. I call them up. He has a U-joint in stock but he's closing in 5 minutes. I tell him my situation and that I didn't know how I was going to get there in 5 minutes, even if I called a cab. He thinks for a moment and tells me if I can wait a little bit, he's closing up the store and is heading my direction and will drop the U-joint off to me ! Cool ! Got a deal !!
Now I call back to the house and my brother-in-law answers, who has come to me rescue only a few months ago when I ran the Suburban out of gas ! LOL. So I ask him if Ed's Towing and AAA Roadside Repair service is on standby as I have need for assistance. I give him the list of tools to grab off the workbench and give him my 20. To which that response was something like, "What the F- are you doing all the way out there?! I don't even know which direction you're in or how to get there!" So I relay some directions and he sets sails.
The kids and I push the Monte to the back of the lot and under a pole light and then head inside Wally World. I get some shop towels, hand cleaner, wheel chocks (forgot to tell my rescuer to grab mine from the house), and a couple of hot pizza's from their in-store Subway.
Ed shows up about an hour later. We fire up the propane torch and melt out the plastic retainers and then pop off the internal clips while my 8-year old son is under the car to unbolt the yoke clamps from the differential. We get everything together and bolted up tight in another 20 minutes and have the car back down to the ground. We take care of our garbage, clean up our hands and we are back on the road again with a new universal joint and one heck of a story !! What should have been a 2.5-3.0 hour trip became 6.5 hours as we waited for parts, tools, and then made repairs in the Wally parking lot.
We never did get to go by the junkyard as it was 8:00PM at this point and dark. And now I wish I had gotten the kid's number for the 85 SS. I had a guy call me just a few days later this week asking about doors and a trunk lid for an 86 SS. Word around the hills here is that I'm the Monte guy and can't help find parts. Plus I really could have used that engine from that SS to transplant into the 75 for a while or at least the intake and carb setup !! I could have gotten $600-worth of parts and usage out of that car. Dang my luck !!
Anyway, I apologize for my absence and I hope you all enjoyed that story. Oh, and you know that has to be a real story cause you just can't make schtuff like that up !!
HardRocker
2GMontes@gmail.com
HardRocker 
